I'm getting married.
I'm buying my first home.
I'm working more than I'm doing anything else.
I'm transitioning into adulthood.
There really is a lot going on in my life right now...and I feel like I didn't plan any of it.
I mean, it's not like I didn't know it was coming, at least eventually. Three years ago I "knew" that at some point I would be out of college. I "knew" that at some point I would not think of my parent's house as my house. Three years ago I at least hoped that I would get married, that my life would change and move forward. But none of this was intentional. None of this came packaged in a five-year plan, with exponential growth figures and due dates and charts.
(It came without packages, boxes, and bags! Anybody?)
It just wasn't intentional. And while I'm very glad that all of this is happening...I don't want to just fall into an unintentional, accidental life. I LOVE what I've fallen into thus far, but believe you me, it is nothing short of the grace of God that has led me to this lovely puffy pillow stage of life that I'm at right now. I am incredibly blessed to have been allowed to unintentionally end up here. But it can't keep going on like this. I don't want to just meander my way through life without purposefully moving toward and working for something. But how, you ask, am I going to change my ways?
To answer that question, let me take things back a few months.
My mother--ever dedicated (intentionally) to her duty to disciple her children--suggested last November that the two of us, along with two other ladies from our church, read a book that she had read in her younger years. It had made a significant impact on her walk with the Lord, and she hoped it might do the same again in her life, and also in ours.
The book was Anne Ortlund's Disciplines of the Beautiful Woman, the first of three in her larger volume, The Gentle Ways of the Beautiful Woman: A Practical Guide to Spiritual Beauty. Now, when I first saw this thing, I got a little nervous. It looked a little old, a little outdated, and a little bit written by someone who was way more wife-y than I am. And it is, all of those things. But that's not all. Once I cracked the cover, I had the pleasure of reading from the heart of a woman that I came to truly admire.
At the heart of the book, it's theme really centered around discipline. Ortlund executes the most mind blowing discipline I've ever heard of. She has in her wardrobe only twelve outfits, and she has each of those outfits listed out on pieces of papers that she keeps filed, so that she knows exactly what she owns, so that getting dressed in the morning takes only five minutes.
Let's be clear about one thing...I will never be like that.
I would, however, like to be more disciplined on a grander scale. Before she got into any suggestions about how we might discipline and organize our concrete lives, she introduced the idea of being disciplined in life on a grander scale. In our spiritual, mental, and social lives we ought to be disciplined. I can't re-write the book for you, so allow me to cut to the chase. Per the suggestion of the author, I was moved to set forth lifelong purposes for my life, and then a set of yearly goals to see those purposes come about.
Let me show you what I came up with...maybe it will better illuminate what I'm trying to say:
Life Goals/Purposes--who I want to be
- A woman of God who leaves a legacy of faith and obedience
- A woman who can show herself to God as one approved, a workman who does not need to be ashamed, but who correctly handles the Word of Truth. 2 Timothy 2:15
- A biblical, supportive, submissive, disgustingly-in-love wife. My husband’s best friend and committed help meet.
- A mother who raises disciples.
- Successful at work/ a hard worker
- A woman committed to a life of ministry.
- A woman committed to self-betterment.
- Read through the Bible (purposes 1&2)
- Meditate on/memorize one verse a week (purposes 1&2)
- Have a discipleship group (purposes 1&6)
- Read two books that will offer me biblical instruction (purpose 2)
- Get to & maintain a healthy physique, have an established routine for taking care of my body (purpose 3&7)
- Give intentional, focused effort on learning how to better care for, understand, befriend, and love Dan (purposes 1,3,&5)
- Read two books off of my list (purpose 7)
- Finish my B.A. (purposes 5&7)
- Get certified to teach (purposes 3,5,&7)
- Earn enough Jmarie profit to send two El Salvador teens to camp (purposes 1,5,6,&7)
Do you see how this list of goals differs from other lists? How this is not just a set of New Year's Resolutions? I really love this idea...that we ought to do certain things with an ultimate end point in line. I love that each of the things on my list has at least one purpose behind it, driving me to become the person that I really want to be.
I want to be intentional, and go through life purposefully. Thought I'd let you know.
What do you think? Are you moving with purpose? What are you doing this year, this month, this week, today...to become the person you should be?
