Moving Toward the Goal

There is a lot going on in my life right now.

I'm getting married.
I'm buying my first home.
I'm working more than I'm doing anything else.
I'm transitioning into adulthood.

There really is a lot going on in my life right now...and I feel like I didn't plan any of it.


I mean, it's not like I didn't know it was coming, at least eventually. Three years ago I "knew" that at some point I would be out of college. I "knew" that at some point I would not think of my parent's house as my house. Three years ago I at least hoped that I would get married, that my life would change and move forward.  But none of this was intentional.  None of this came packaged in a five-year plan, with exponential growth figures and due dates and charts.

(It came without packages, boxes, and bags! Anybody?)

It just wasn't intentional.  And while I'm very glad that all of this is happening...I don't want to just fall into an unintentional, accidental life.  I LOVE what I've fallen into thus far, but believe you me, it is nothing short of the grace of God that has led me to this lovely puffy pillow stage of life that I'm at right now. I am incredibly blessed to have been allowed to unintentionally end up here. But it can't keep going on like this.  I don't want to just meander my way through life without purposefully moving toward and working for something. But how, you ask, am I going to change my ways?

To answer that question, let me take things back a few months.

My mother--ever dedicated (intentionally) to her duty to disciple her children--suggested last November that the two of us, along with two other ladies from our church, read a book that she had read in her younger years. It had made a significant impact on her walk with the Lord, and she hoped it might do the same again in her life, and also in ours.

The book was Anne Ortlund's Disciplines of the Beautiful Woman, the first of three in her larger volume, The Gentle Ways of the Beautiful Woman: A Practical Guide to Spiritual Beauty. Now, when I first saw this thing, I got a little nervous. It looked a little old, a little outdated, and a little bit written by someone who was way more wife-y than I am. And it is, all of those things. But that's not all. Once I cracked the cover, I had the pleasure of reading from the heart of a woman that I came to truly admire. 

At the heart of the book, it's theme really centered around discipline.  Ortlund executes the most mind blowing discipline I've ever heard of. She has in her wardrobe only twelve outfits, and she has each of those outfits listed out on pieces of papers that she keeps filed, so that she knows exactly what she owns, so that getting dressed in the morning takes only five minutes. 

Let's be clear about one thing...I will never be like that. 

I would, however, like to be more disciplined on a grander scale. Before she got into any suggestions about how we might discipline and organize our concrete lives, she introduced the idea of being disciplined in life on a grander scale. In our spiritual, mental, and social lives we ought to be disciplined. I can't re-write the book for you, so allow me to cut to the chase.  Per the suggestion of the author, I was moved to set forth lifelong purposes for my life, and then a set of yearly goals to see those purposes come about. 

Let me show you what I came up with...maybe it will better illuminate what I'm trying to say: 

Life Goals/Purposes--who I want to be

• A woman of God who leaves a legacy of faith and obedience
• A woman who can show herself to God as one approved, a workman who does not need to be ashamed, but who correctly handles the Word of Truth. 2 Timothy 2:15
• A biblical, supportive, submissive, disgustingly-in-love wife. My husband’s best friend and committed help meet.
• A mother who raises disciples.
• Successful at work/ a hard worker
• A woman committed to a life of ministry.
• A woman committed to self-betterment.

One-Year Goals--the steps I will take in 2012 to become who I want to be

• Read through the Bible (purposes 1&2)
• Meditate on/memorize one verse a week (purposes 1&2)
• Have a discipleship group (purposes 1&6)
• Read two books that will offer me biblical instruction (purpose 2)
• Get to & maintain a healthy physique, have an established routine for taking care of my body (purpose 3&7)
• Give intentional, focused effort on learning how to better care for, understand, befriend, and love Dan (purposes 1,3,&5)
• Read two books off of my list (purpose 7)
• Finish my B.A. (purposes 5&7)
• Get certified to teach (purposes 3,5,&7)
• Earn enough Jmarie profit to send two El Salvador teens to camp (purposes 1,5,6,&7)

Do you see how this list of goals differs from other lists? How this is not just a set of New Year's Resolutions? I really love this idea...that we ought to do certain things with an ultimate end point in line.  I love that each of the things on my list has at least one purpose behind it, driving me to become the person that I really want to be. 

I want to be intentional, and go through life purposefully. Thought I'd let you know. 

What do you think? Are you moving with purpose? What are you doing this year, this month, this week, today...to become the person you should be? 

The Rules of Engagement

Mimicking my last post, I will say again that it has been a long time since I've posted and that I deeply apologize. I am sure that all fourteen of my followers have been worried sick about me.

But please, cease your worrying.

I'm fine.

In fact, I'm better than fine. I'm engaged!

My being better than fine due to my engagement is following the logic that since I am a woman, all I want out of life is to be married. Ergo, I am doing quite well. Marriage follows engagement. It's nice to know that all my desires have now been met, and that I've nothing more to want from life for the rest of my days...

All kidding aside, being engaged is great. However, I have to admit that I wasn't entirely prepared for it.  I'm not really the dreamed-about-my-wedding-since-I-could-walk type, so when I got that pretty little ring...I had no idea what to do next. Therefore, just in case any one of the fourteen of you ever has some perfect man put a ring on it and you find yourself questioning the next step, I give you:

The Rules of Engagement


(Like my fancy wordplay?)

Okay, here we go. Rule number...

1.) Say, "Yes." 
         Yup, it's the first step. Honestly, when he knelt down and popped the question, I was a little shocked. So much so, that it was not until several moments later I actually said yes.

             So, ladies, do the right thing. Get it settled right from the bat.

2.) Set a date...but not right away.
         Dan and I got engaged in Atlanta, and all we talked about the entire drive back to Michigan was dates. In fact, even before we got engaged we talked about dates.  Finally, we came to a conclusion, settling on a later weekend in May. But if you got our Save-the-Dates...

         Yeah. For those of you keeping track at home, the first weekend in June is not the same as a late weekend in May.  Because here's the thing about setting a date...there are a LOT of variables to think about. Consider, for instance, whether your wedding party will able to attend. In our case we had to think about a few other weddings (a cousin of mine got engaged the same week Dan and I did), several pregnancies (not mine, don't worry), graduation parties...and that's just for starters. After we had sent out our Save-the-Dates it occurred to me (via the critical "no's" of several owners of beautiful wedding venues) that we maybe would have benefited from checking for available dates at potential wedding venues before we finalized our decision.

3.) Don't take your ring off.

             Honestly, I did not know this. Apparently taking your engagement ring off (for any reason other than getting it appraised and/or cleaned) is a big no-no in the Rules of Engagement. The first time someone asked to see my ring, I took it off and held it out to her. She responded well...and yet it was very clear to me that I should never, ever do that again. 

4.) Don't freak out...this isn't really all about you.

            If you expect to talk about yourself and your wedding during your engagement...quit that. Your engagement is the opportunity that every other married woman has been waiting for--the one chance they have to talk about their wedding.  As soon as we made our wedding plans known, everyone else made their wedding plans known, even if it had happened thirty years ago. It seemed to me like every conversation started with, "Congratulations! At our wedding..."

           All cynicism aside, this is not a bad thing. It threw me off a little bit at first, but now that I'm used to it, I don't mind it at all. In fact, I don't blame them at all...if this same thing happened to them during their engagement, it's totally understandable. I can't wait until someone else gets engaged so that I can talk about my wedding. 

           Okay, NOW, all cynicism aside, it really isn't a bad thing. The heart behind this sharing of wedding successes and traumas is one that desires that a newly engaged couple learn from the past.  Why wouldn't I want to know where to get a great, bank-friendly dress, or where not to hire a DJ? After all, a wedding is only one day, but apparently it is one that is so chock-full of memories and lessons that it takes an entire lifetime to tell all the stories. Listen, and love it. 

5.) You will ignore your wedding timeline. 
           My future sister-in-law gave me a wedding planning book, my cousin gave me bridal magazines, and a friend referred Dan and I to a wedding website.  All three of these include detail wedding timelines--instructions and suggestions about when and how to get done all the things that are required for a wedding come together. On my wedding website timeline I have 150+ to-dos....and 45 of them are overdue. I'm optimistic, though. I think we will probably still get married.
          From what it sounds like, this happens to everyone. So I'm not going to freak out about it. I'm just going to enjoy being engaged.

 


          That is the best I can offer to anyone newly engaged.  I think it's a solid start, though.


Note: This will not become a wedding blog.  This is still a spot for me to come and muse, and it will remain that way.  The fact that I will be musing about my wedding from time to time over the next few months may lead to another wedding related post or two, but I'll stick around after I'm married, too. This is just what's currently on my mind. :)

El Salvador...the Update post.

So, it has been...

...way too long.

And I'm sorry.

I came here several times before to try and let you know how it all went down, I promise, I did, but...I just didn't know what to say.

Have you ever had a mountaintop experience?

I have. Actually, I've had several. Actually...I've had one particular mountaintop experience where I was literally on the top of a mountain.

see?

Just me and the besty, climbing rocks in CA. Four years ago...

Anyway, the mountaintop. A mountaintop experience is something beyond memorable.  You certainly will remember it for the rest of your life, but it is so much more than that. It changes who you are, how you think, what you do. It's something that you have to work for, it includes the grueling climb and the glorious view from the top...and the let-down and release of having to walk yourself back down to flat land. It is specific, and definitely your very own--someone else may have climbed a mountain before, but they did not climb what you climbed, or how you climbed. They did not see what you saw. Your mountaintop experience is your very own...and that makes it dreadfully precious.

It also makes it dreadfully difficult to talk about.

My trip to El Salvador was certainly a mountaintop experience.  I spent two weeks in Zacatecoluca, El Salvador, at a Palabra de Vida camp facility.  During the weekdays, our team went into public schools and performed skits and songs for the student body.

 

After that we were allowed to go into the classrooms with a translator to present the Gospel on a more intimate basis. 

I could give you details...so many details...and the names of team members, and of the schools, and stories and jokes about our time there...but I could not do it justice. I could try to reproduce the situations and moments that meant the most to me, the times when I knew I was learning, when I knew I was climbing...

But you still wouldn't be on my mountain.

The big stuff, the stuff that has to be shared, that which must be shared in order that it really gets fleshed out, that will come out in later posts. You can pretty much count on it. There are things that I have got to write about...so I will. I won't do it here, now, because I would be writing forever. And you would be reading forever.

Here's what you should know right now, though:

We were able to share the gospel with over five thousand people.

Over two thousand of them claimed to accept Christ as their Savior.

I've never before been more struck with how unworthy I am to be involved in the work of sharing the Gospel.
Neither have I been more aware of the fact that sharing the Gospel is the only work in which I should really be involved. That's my identity. It should be, anyway.

I'm not a numbers person, at all. I'm a cynic by nature, and who knows what people are really thinking or committing to when they make commitments.
That being said, though, those numbers rocked my world.

It was my mountaintop. 

Thanks for taking part in it (if you did...). Thanks for praying, thanks for supporting....Thank you. It changed my life. 

And again...sorry it took so long.

El Salvador: Part IV

For those of you who are praying for my team and me as we acclimate to the environment in El Salvador...
















...stop it right now.















!















Just kidding. Mostly. The thing is, we're not in quite in El Salvador yet. Yes, I know, I can hear the shock in your voices now:



"What?! All this time we've been praying for the safety of your flight on the twenty-fifth, praying for a welcome reception that day, praying for you to go to El Salvador!!!"



Well now, my shocked prayer warriors, take heart. Everything is fine. It's just behind. We got to the airport yesterday just in time to be told that our flight had been cancelled. After a moment or two of scratching our heads about what to do next, our team gathered together for a word of prayer, and then left it to our fearless leader to....fearlessly lead.







After a little broken English, a little broken Spanish, a little more confusion, and a little more prayer, we gave all fourteen of our passports to a little lady with a nametag on a lanyard, and hopped on a shuttle to the Hampton Inn.


Yup. Just gave her our passports.  Some things just don't make sense unless you're following God. 



The airline (Taca) put everyone from the flight up in the hotel for the night, gave us vouchers for dinner yesterday and lunch today, gave us a $200 voucher in case we had any luggage that was overweight, and put us on a flight for five o'clock today. 




On the busride to the Inn, Miss Fay and I were able to talk with a lady named Roxanna.  She is going to visit her family in El Salvador.  She was struck by Miss Fay's testimony of having a son who is a missionary in Indonesia.  Who would let their children be so far away for so long?  Someone who knows that God's love and glory is worth it.

The restaurant we ate at, a Colombian joint "Patacon," had incredible food, and an opportunity for me to use a little of my Spanish.

The beds and showers at the hotel are....awesome.


The experience as a whole? One to chalk up as a win, I think.

Praise de Lord.



Is there a lesson to be learned here? Oh yeah. All kinds of lessons.  Let's list them, shall we?

1.) The best thing to do in a crisis situation where one is traveling internationally is to give your passport to a stranger as soon as possible.
2.) Stressfully powering your way to get what you want/need does not always work...we can probably say that it's generally unneccessary. And that's because...
3.) God is in control.
4.) Matching t-shirts and good attitudes are a great testimony for Christ.
5.) The mission field involves every moment, every day. There's no need to wait until you hit foreign soil to testify of God's importance to you.




Alright, so some of that is a little facetious in nature (you can sort out which parts) but the moral of the story is: God wins.  Our plans and schedule are all in his hands.  The extra night of sleep here provided some much needed energy and rest for members of the group who have been feeling a little under the weather. 

"He's got the whole world...in his hands..."



I have greatly exceeded the fifteen-minute limit on the "Business Center" computers in the lobby of the hotel, so that's all I'll write for now. 

Hoping to write again soon! Pray for us. :)

El Salvador: Part III (Written right now, on a real laptop, and not on my iPod)

Today. Today, today, today.

I can't even tell you how much I'm learning, how much I'm enjoying my time here, how much I'm being encouraged.

Word of Life is such a special place.  It is such a blessing to be able to get away from "the real world" for a little while and go to...a bubble. Sometimes people refer to WOL as being bubble-esque (Bubblicious?) in a negative way...but I can only see it as a gift.  We aren't called to bubbles...we can't just spend the entirety of our Christian lives in total avoidance of unbelievers...but I do believe that we are called to periods of refreshment, fellowship, reprieve, focus...you know.  There is so much going on in our lives--work, school, socializing, sports, meetings, reunions, shopping, errands, banking, laundry--it can be so easy to get discouraged and distracted.  How beautiful a gift to be able to come to a setting where the Lord uses every conversation and song and meeting to re-direct my heart to the fact that I am here to serve Him, only.  That is my only purpose in life. Serving God.  Loving God.  Serving God by serving people, loving God by loving people.

That. Is. Why. I'm. Here. On this earth. I have no other purpose. Everything else I do (work, school, socializing, sports, meetings, reunions, shopping, errands, banking, laundry) should be a manifestation of my service to God.

I love being reminded of that. I need to be reminded of that.

So. In case you haven't caught on, I'm appreciating being back at Word of Life for a little bit of focus.

(And to clarify...WOL hardly avoids unbelievers.  It is currently filled with 400 campers, 66 of whom came forward on Saturday night to talk about making a salvation decision, and more of whom are asking questions about the Lord every day.  This isn't like The Village or anything, there is plenty of interaction with the outside world, plenty of ministry.  It's just nice to be in a place where the focus of the staff and the establishment is to glorify the Lord.)

Ahhhhh I have less than ten minutes before practice and SO MUCH MORE TO SAYYYY!!!!


(Did I just put extra letters in my word for emphasis? That's gross.)



Okay, well, I'll leave you with one very exciting tid-bit from today.


...



I LEARNED TO MAKE BALLOON ANIMALS!!!!!!

Well, "animal," actually. Just a dog. I can also make an apple, a pirate sword, and a regular sword...but none of those are animals.

How great is that? Now I can be a missionary/teacher/clown. :D

El Salvador....here we come. 

El Salvador: Part 2 1/2 (Written very very late on Monday, or very early on Tuesday...)

Details, details, details. It has occurred to me that there are just some things that you really need to know...like all of the Word of Life acronyms, the names of my team members, our trip dates...some of the details.  Well, consider this post a "Map Key" of sorts.

WOL acronyms. Know them, love them. (Or just know them...it's not particularly necessary that you have any feelings about them.)

WOL: Word of Life
HBPAC: Harry Bolback Performing Arts Center (One of the buildings on the FL campus, used for GP.)
CC: Conference Center
YC: Youth Camp
GP: Gospel Productions (WOL puts out two productions a year, "The Sights and Sounds of Christmas" and "Jesus, Behold the Man")
GTAC: George Theiss Assembly Center (The building in the YC which all of the BI classes are held during the schoolyear, and where the meetings and rallies are held during summer camp.)
BI or WOLBI: Word of Life Bible Institute

I think that list will give you enough to have a working acronym vocabulary to maneuver your way around this blog. :)

Now, my team members. I am traveling to El Salvador with the WOL 2010-11 Ensemble.  This consists of eight BI students, four boys and four girls, and their director and his wife.

Girls: Ashley Harwell, Brittany Shipton, Tori Emerson, Holley Vann
Guys: Micah, Ethan, Kyle, Josh (boys don't have last names...do they?)
Tom and Fay Phillips are the leaders of the ensemble.

(I was on the ensemble when I was a BI student in 2007-08.  It was an experience that left me with lifelong friends, tons of stories, and lots of growth.  Their going on this trip was what made me initially interested to go along.)

There are also three high school students traveling with us:

Lauren (from Ft. Wayne, Indiana)
Olivia (from Maryland)
Nate [the Great] (from Manasses, Virginia)

Matt Melville is a missionary who works at WOL New York with short term missions.  He has been teaching our classes and will be our fearless leader on the trip.

And then of course there's moi....serving as the "Unit Leader" for the girls.  I get to pour into the lives of these six ladies for the next three weeks in an uninhibited way.

It. Is. So. Awesome. Getting to know them, praying with them, encouraging them, teaching them, learning from them...praise the Lord for His family!!!

And the missing member of our team is Josiah.  He's currently in Argentina (because wouldn't you know it, there's a WOLBI down there, too!) and will meet us in El Salvador.

We will be leaving on Saturday, June 25th and coming back on July 9th.

Hoorah!


That's all, folks!

El Salvador: Part Two (Written on Monday, June 20th)

I apologize for not posting the next day like I said I would.  For ease of travel as well as focus-oriented purposes, I didn't bring a laptop with me to Florida.  I am therefore required to strike a beggar's pose for access to a computer.  If I do come across a generous soul with a laptop, I have to go up to the other end of campus, to the conference center, in order to use the Internet.  (The campus is divided into two sections, the youth camp [where I am being housed this training week in a cabin with the other girls from my trip] at one end, and the conference center at the other end [where the boys are being housed and where we have all of our Student Fusion meetings]. It is about a twelve minute walk from one end of campus to the other.) It all gets kind of difficult to work out with the borrowing and the walking and the writing and the posting when I'm trying to fit it into the already fairly strict schedule for Student Fusion.

Ergo (is that really how you spell that?!) I don't have a lot of opportunities to use a computer and/or post.  This whole post is being thumb-typed into a note on my iPod touch.  I'll post it when I go up to the CC (conference center, that is. WOL runs on acronyms...) in a little while for practice.  This way, I can write whenever I get a few spare minutes, and not try and find time in my schedule for borrowing, walking, and posting to all happen at once.

Have I clarified Student Fusion yet?  That is the name of the WOL program that runs short term mission trips.

And speaking of schedules, I'm sure you're all dying to know what a day in the life of a typical Student Fusion member looks like during training week. Right? Right. Well let me tell you.

7:45--8:45am ----------Breakfast
8:45--9:15am ----------Quiet Time
9:30--10:30am ---------Bible Hour (I'm not sure what happens in the fifteen minutes between Quiet Time and Bible Hour...anything is possible, really.) (Oh yeah. Bible Hour is actually part of summer camp. We're conveniently located in a cabin, while camp is going on...so we take advantage of the opportunities to hear the Word of God taught. Fist pump, it's good stuff.)
11;30--12:30pm--------Student Fusion class
12:30pm----------------Lunch
1:00--2~3:00-----------Student Fusion class
2~3:00--4:00pm--------Free Time/walkingborrowingbloggingtime/devo-planning time
4:15--5:30pm-----------Student Fusion practice
5:30--6:30pm-----------Dinner
(The rest of the evening is full of camp activities--an evening meeting, a rally, a game--in which we generally take part...because we can. :) )
11:00pm----------------In dorms/Devos
11:30~12:00pm---------Lights out

And there it is.  With the exception of Wednesday, our day off, that is what our days will consist of all week. In our classes we get to know one another, discuss and prepare ourselves for the cross-cultural encounters we'll have in El Salvador (because you know how annoying those uninformed, loud Americans can be in a foreign country...), go over a daily group devo that prepares our hearts for the trip, and learn how to implement the tools we'll be using to share the gospel.  Today we started working with the Evangecube...the Gospel message displayed in unfolding boxes of universally understood, colorful pictures. Huzzah for crossing  language barriers!

The practices are where we learn our songs and skits we'll be performingin El Salvador.  I can't tell you much about those yet because I...haven't yet experienced one.  However, the first one starts in about twenty minutes.  I had better get going...after all, I've got a twelve minute walk up to the CC.

Continue to pray for us! I will post again as soon as possible.

El Salvador: The Pioneer Post

Hello all!

Some of you (most of you, probably) know that my summer plans for twenty-eleven include a mission trip to El Salvador.

I am currently on that mission trip. :) Huzzah!!

Our instructions were to be at the Word of Life campus in Hudson, Florida by Saturday, June 18th.  In order to have a leg up on the rest of the group, I decided to fly in a day early. Or maybe that's just the way it worked out with booking flights in a convenient and affordable manner...I really can't be sure.  Either way, my plane landed in Clearwater around five this afternoon, where I was met by a good friend--my escort back from the airport. We grabbed dinner at Chick-fil-a (a Christian trip should start with Christian food) and made it back to campus just in time for the dedication campfire.

This was a special thing for me to take in. :)

Those of you familiar with the way that Word of Life (hereafter referred to as WOL ;) ) runs their summer camps are no strangers to the campfire.  Each week at the fire the campers gather and listen to a stirring sermon that ultimately gives them the a challenge to completely lay down their lives before the Lord.  If the campers come forward at the end of this service and offer themselves to this challenge, they are given a stick. The campers then throw these sticks into the fire, symbolizing their commitment that it is time for them to throw off the old man and allow God's refining fire to form the new man.  It is always moving.

Tonight's campfire service was especially touching for me, however.  The youth gathered around this fire were not campers, but rather the counselors and volunteer workers for the camp.  This dedication was to live this summer as unto the Lord.  I watched many young men and women make their way forward and cast their sticks into the fire and couldn't help but get really excited for what God is going to do this summer.

It's exciting to see committed people living out their commitments. Whoosh.

Tomorrow I'll really be getting into the work that is involved with my short term mission team, and I'll be sure to give a detailed post about all of that. I will offer the information that I'll be serving as a Unit Leader for the girls on the team--a sort of counselor's counselor--and that assignment of service is coming as a total blessing for me. Please pray for me, that I will have many opportunities to pour into the lives of these young women over the next three weeks.  Pray that God gives me wisdom, love, and the ability to glorify Him continually.  I feel so inadequate when it comes to serving sometimes...

ach.

God has me here. He will use me. I am here for a purpose. Right right right.


:)


Oh, what's that you ask? You want to know how I'm doing with my support? Thanks for reminding me, I almost forgot. :) I have raised about fifty percent of my financial support. (Wahoo!!!) Several hundred dollars were raised through a garage sale last Saturday, and some more has come in from much-appreciated givers.  The total cost of the trip is at about $2,300.  If you feel led to give, please contact me at jmariebrondyke@gmail.com.  I am so thankful for the support that has come in thus far, but am mindful that it's not all in yet. :)


Will post again tomorrow. Miss you if I'm not with you!


-jmarie

Sorry...

I know.

I know that it has been FOREVER since I've posted, and that I'm not even close to staying on top of my once-a-week deal that I made with myself.

I know.

And I'm sorry.

Things have been super crazy lately, what with graduation coming up and all, but I promise, as soon as I get through next week and past that major life milestone...I will post.

And you will find out who the winners of the Hint Fiction thing are.

And you will hear from me, again, on a [fairly] regular basis.



I miss you, too.

Hints were a Hit!

The blogpost from last week seemed to generate quite a bit of interest, and I'm so glad about that!

(Okay, yes, the amount of interest was heightened by the discussion about how I could do away with Dan, but the hint fiction itself did get some legitimate feedback. I promise.)

One of the most fun things about Hint Fiction is that they are short, short indeed, and their wittle-bitty-ness enables an author to write four or five first drafts in one setting, and if none of them are any good, you can just scrap the whole lot, and lose very little time in the process! I happen to think the dwarf-esque qualities of Hint Fiction also makes it seem like an attainable goal for all authors...because, let's face it, the prospect of an entire novel can make even a seasoned short-story veteran shake in the knees. Twenty-five words, though? We can handle that, easy!!


So I've had an idea. Why don't you try your hand at a Hint Fiction piece or two? Come on, I know you like Hint Fiction...you told me so! The rules are easy: the story should be 25 words or less; the title is not included in the word count. You can email them to me via this link or the one at the bottom, I will peruse them, get a little other English-major input, and post the top 5 next week. What do you think, will you play with me? Email your submissions by Sunday, April 3rd, with the subject filled in as "Hint Fiction," and we'll set this thing rolling.

(If no one sends me anything...I'll just make up some of my own and pretend like people were interested.)

Maybe I'll be able to come up with some sort of prize? Now are you enticed?


Here are some helpful tips:

1.) Use the freedom of the title to your advantage--it should add to the story, not just label it.

2.) Don't offer little pieces of advice, i.e. "The yellow snow is not for eating." This may be the result of a story, but it is not a story.

3.) A successful piece of super-short fiction is one that requires the reader to piece some things together. They should be able to take the clues, the hints, you've given, and make sense of what happened in the story. If your reader, after having thought things through, is still saying, "What happened?" after reading your hint fiction, one of two things is true: 1.)Your reader is not very bright, or 2.) Your story is not actually a story. The latter of these two things is more often the case. Here's an example of that which is not a story: The red shoe sat in the driveway. What happened? I don't know, and neither do you, and there's no way either of us will be able to figure it out.





Okay. So. Have fun! :)



(I'd also like to give a shout out to Mrs. Brondyke's computer classes, both 4th and 5th grades. Pay attention, and be nice to my mom. :) If one of you creates a blog, let me know. I'll hit it up.)

Just a Hint of Creativity...

Oh, hallo.



(In my mind, that's what "hello" sounds like with a distinguished, Oxford English accent.)



I broke my promise and didn't post last week but that's okay. It's okay. I was kind of expecting I would have thousands of emails from my many, many followers, begging me to return, saying that they couldn't carry on without a weekly blogpost...



...but apparently the internet crashed all over the world for the entire week, because I received no emails. Hate when that happens.



I didn't notice the crash because I was in Orlando for the week. (HA! Did you see how I did that, internet predators? How I excersized caution by not informing you of my absence until after I'd returned? Did you notice? Are you disappointed that you can't rob me now? You should be. That's safe blogging, folks. Learn it. Love it.)



But I'm back now! Yippee! Back at school, back to work, back to the grind...



...and back to my creative writing class!



I like creative writing. I'm a little shy about it, but I have had so much fun this semester learning some of the ins and outs of the crafts. It's so neat to, in one 75 minute class period, identify some of the rookie mistakes that have really been holding back my writing. I'm learning much, my friends, much indeed.



Over break we had an assignment/experiment in Flash Fiction and Hint Fiction. Flash Fiction is essentially a very short story, 100-500 words. Hint Fiction is an even shorter story, around 25 words or less.



Whaaaaat? Can you even get a whole story into twenty-five words?



Turns out you can.



The whole thing apparently stemmed off the famous six word novel by Ernest Hemingway:



"For sale: baby shoes, never worn"



Sad and short, that's the novel. It amazes me that this is a legitimate form of literature. I am not entirely sure how I feel about it, it seems like some of it just alludes to a story rather than tells one, but hey, it is referred to as "hint" fiction, right?



There is an anthology of Hint Fiction available. We read some of the stories in class. I remember my favorite:





"Peanut Butter"

He was allergic. She pretended not to know.





Is it awful that that was my favorite? Sorry. I wish I could remember the one Flannery O'Connor wrote...it would help prove that it's a legitimate form of literature, because she's a legitimate author...albeit a creepy, dark, weirdly religious author...


I digress.




I wrote some hint fiction myself! (Cue exciting music!)

And okay, okay, okay!!! Since you're begging, I'll share a couple of them with you. But just two! Don't get greedy, now. I hope you like them. They're little. And fun.






"On Your Wedding Day"

Today's the big day. I wanted to help, so I washed your veil. I didn't even know I owned red socks. Sorry.





"Lesson for an Eight-Year-Old"

No one ever told him that adults drank iced coffee, or that despite their similar appearances, it tasted nothing like Coca-cola.







The first one is my favorite. The second one...well, they're both up for revision. But I thought I'd share them. Have a good day!

It's Raining Today...

Rain is a funny thing, isn't it? It can be depressing, exciting, pleasant, sad, calming, aggravating, refreshing...

Oh, the versatility of the sky.

Right now I'm a little nonplussed by the rain. I don't mind rain one bit when it is pouring down on my house, pounding on my skylights. It makes me feel like I can do anything I want within the little cocoon of my room. Usually "anything I want" on rainy day involves reading something I want to read, journaling, cleaning (not in a hurried, we're-having-company sort of way, but in an inquisitive, clean-out-your-closet-for-hours-and-ponder-over-what-you-find-there sort of way...), crafting...

*Sigh.

Doesn't that sound nice? Mmmm. Rainy days are taking a shower and not putting on makeup, and employing yourself in something you enjoy. Drinking tea. Reading a book.

Makin' banana pancakes...you know.

I have a load of things to do today, though, so it's kind of killing the rain-atmosphere for me. Homework, cleaning, packing for Florida, doing responsible school-y things. Not that I don't enjoy these things...but I have to do them. Having to do something is no fun. Choosing to do something...now that I can be pleased by.

Eh. I'm six years old.

"I'll do it cause I want to, not because you tell me to!"


(Yeah right. I wish I had been that cute when I was six.)



Oh the rain.
Joy in every day, though, right?


I know this hasn't been a particularly insightful post. Sorry. :/ Couldn't help myself but muse a bit. I was just looking out the window, thinking...

Rain is a funny thing, isn't it?

Hello Again...

Hello, March.

Hello, blog...

Hello Dolly?


Hmmm....Say "Hello" out loud a few times...weird, isn't it?


Way back in January, I made New Year's Resolutions. One of them was to blog at least once a week.

...


oops.

I'll just leave it to your imagination as to how well my other resolutions are going. :/

I suppose it's better late than never, so here I am, true to form: late. Being late is probably one of the only areas of my life in which I am consistent. Is that depressing? I should probably feel ashamed about it.


I do feel a little bit of shame. It's one of those things that I feel like I don't have to worry about right now, at this point in my life. One of those things that I seem to think will just...kick in when I reach adulthood. Kind of like being organized, or responsible, or mature...I just assume that by the time I get all grown up, I'll be there.

Except I just realized something...

...I'm already twenty-two.

Oh...snap. So I'm very nearly grown up. I guess it has just occurred to me that I won't wake up one morning and have reached mature adulthood overnight. It's gonna have to start somewhere. I'm going to have to start making conscious decisions to be organized, and responsible, and mature...and maybe, hopefully, someday...I'll have gotten there.


(Fear not, those of you who know and love my more ridiculous and childlike tendencies, for there are some things I'll never relinquish to maturity. Laughing out loud, whistling, sitting on the ground, climbing on things...)


I think I'm going to take the same approach with this blog. I really enjoy blogging, I enjoy having this space of open thought and creativity. I think it's delightful. Wonderful.

But I get so gosh-darn intimidated! I look at other blogs and they're all...sponsored and followed and themed and...and I feel so silly! My blog has no point! I have no followers whom I don't know personally! I'm not doing anything exciting!!

Breathe.

I think it would be cool if this became a thing. If I did have a follower I didn't personally know. If my own thoughts and musings went beyond...myself. I would like that. But everybody has to start somewhere, right? Every adult was once a child, every teacher once a student, every leader once a follower. I'm still in the learning stages, still gathering up my building blocks. What I need to be doing now is just making little decisions, taking little actions to be blog-esque. And then maybe, hopefully, someday...I'll have gotten there.

:)

See how my philosophy has come around full circle? Excited! Excited!


So...in order to be blog-esque, I'm going to commit to two things.

1.) I really am going to try and blog at least once a week.
2.) I'm going to post more pictures. Pictures should feel at home in a blog.

(Okay, I'm going to commit to three things...but I have to preface #3 with an explanation...)

A lot of blogs are centered around crafti-ness. I like that. I like when I get to have crafternoons. However, I'm a full-time student with a part-time job, a boyfriend (that's right! He made the blog! NOW it's official.) and a strong commitment to my church and friends. What does that mean? I am ridiculously busy. I cannot do a craft-a-day. But maybe I can do one a week? We'll see. I am going to compose a list of things (from other crafty blogs) I want to try my hand at, and I will link the How-To's or Tutorials or DIY's from the mother-blog, so as not to try and act like I came up with it on my own.

So...drum roll....

3.) I'm going to be crafty. --er. Crafty-er than I have been. And I'll post about it.

Who knows, maybe someday I'll be able to come up with my own craft! What what?!




Hmmm...Blogger is being silly, and won't let me post a picture.

But it will happen.





Au Revoir!

Heart's Cry

Well...here I am again, Lord.



You already know this, of course, but I have a bit of a confession to make: I have this horribly disgusting habit of making everything else in the world so much more important than You.




I'm sorry.







I'm so, so sorry.



I have no idea what is wrong with me, why I do things like this, why I don't just allow You to sweep me away in the beautiful freedom that You daily offer. Why am I so insistent on closing myself off to you? Why do I live in this sickening pattern?

I think that at the start of things--and of course, it's a cycle without a start, but I mean the start of my falling away from You--I think that I must know that I'll end up here. I must have it somewhere in the back of my mind...that's got to be the case. I have to see this coming. I should see it coming. I mean, I've done it to myself so many times before, I would have to be some kind of idiot to completely be unaware to the truth that I'm setting myself up for hurt.


Lord, oh...it's just...there is such a huge, revolting disconnect between what I know to be true and what I live out and testify to be true. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry...I'm sorry. Does this pathetic life of mine disgust You like it does me? Does it hurt You to watch me do this to myself? It must. It has to.


...I think.


I don't know.



I'm sorry.


I'm sorry that I don't come to You. I'm sorry that I deny you the joy of satisfying me. You would feed me with the finest of wheat, with honey from the rock You would satisfy me...you see, I know your promises. In my head...I know them. But why don't they matter to me in my heart?? Why don't they affect my life???? Why don't they absolutely change who I am?


Why, oh why, Oh my God am I still searching for satisfaction and contentment and love elsewhere? I am so sorry that I don't allow You to meet these needs of mine,. I am so sorry.


I am such a stupid, foolish girl. There is no reason for me to grieve as I do, I know this. My answer is found in You, I know this. Please, please forgive me for throwing my soul at others...Oh I am so sorry. It must hurt you very much that I just...reject the relationship You've offered me. Forgive me, Lord, please forgive me.


Abba, I am hurting. I am longing for satisfaction in my life, and I confess that I have tried to find it in everything but You. Of course...I haven't found it. I feel like such a fool. I don't even deserve to be able to say this to You. I'm not worth Your love. I don't know why You even allow me to know about Your existence, much less your grace or love...I am so unworthy.

Help me, Father, please help me to come to You, to appreciate the beautiful relationship You have offered me. Please reshape my mind, help me be transformed to the knowledge of You. I am so tired of paining myself by denying you. I am so tired of having to deal with the knowledge that I have only myself to blame for my hurt.

I am a stupid, foolish girl. But...for some reason, You have chosen to love me. You love me. Oh, my Lord, my God, my friend--You love me. Why? I don't know why. But I know that it is true. Your love is there. Thank You. Thank You a thousand times...I am so undeserving. You are everything. Please...give me the grace to see that. Give me the conviction to live that truth out. You are everything.

Sometimes

Sometimes you just don't go to sleep.


Sometimes you just stay up, stand out on your porch all alone and try to take in as much of the sky as you can. You just breathe.







Sometimes you just spend a little time longing for someone to share the starlight with.

Sometimes you just cry.


And sometimes I just pray.

These Days...

Since my last post...everything in my life has changed.




Okay, you're right, that was a bit of an exaggeration, but it was founded on a shred of truth. Maybe more than a shred. A lot has changed.



For instance, I dyed my hair red.









Just kidding!!! Gotcha!



Here are the real changes:



Change number one: my location has shifted. I am now back in the VA. (That's read, "Vee Ehy." And no, I don't have a good reason for prefacing state abbreviations with an article. It's just what I do.)

Change number two: there has been a significant adjustment in how I spend my time. I am now re-instated as a full-time student and as a part-time employee at Panera Bread. Hoorah.

Change number three: the girl whom I have claimed as my best friend since I was six years old got married on Saturday and is now moving to Argentina.

Change number four: this is my Senior year of college. In May I will graduate and for the first time in my life the next step will be entirely in subjection to my choices.




If you don't see the significance in the first three...I hope you're catching on with numero quatro. This is a big deal.



I know that the only thing that stays the same is change...but knowing that doesn't make it easy.




I'm a little scared.











----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Earth changes, but thy soul and God stand sure."

- Elizabeth Barrett Browning

"O visionary world, condition strange, Where naught abiding is but only change."

- James Russell Lowell

"There is a certain relief in change, even though it be from bad to worse; as I have found in traveling in a stagecoach, that it is often a comfort to shift one's position and be bruised in a new place."

- Washington Irving

Consumed

I've not posted in a bit...we'll all just have to deal with that our own ways.


Here's what I'm thinking tonight. I'm thinking about my life. I'm thinking about...my blog, at the moment.

Do you know why it's called By the Word? The answer is multi-faceted actually. The answer which might be the most obvious is that I love words. I do. I love the power of language. I am ever fascinated by the fact that each word is wholly its own...so much more than just a dictionary definition is attached, and therefore one tiny little word has the ability to speak volumes, to change the temperature of a statement entirely. I love literature and poetry and communication...and Boggle, Scrabble, Upwords, and Letter Getter. I really love words. I live by words.

But there's another side to "the Word." In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. The Bible, the manuscript to my life, that is the Word. I am particularly fond of the blog's title because it is a message to me, a reminder that I want to live my life entirely "By the Word."

I know that I have a bit of a reputation for my love of words. But do I have a reputation for my love of the Word?



A sense of urgency has been on my heart lately. I am not of the opinion that a Christian's life is "wasted" if he or she does not go in to full time ministry; working a nine to five with a briefcase and tie is not a sin. However, I am convicted with the thought that a Christian life can be wasted. All of mankind was created to glorify God...it is my special duty to glorify God. My life can be a showcase of His glory whether I punch a clock or preach to the tribes...and it can likewise be a pointless waste of time in either endeavor.

Every moment, every thought, every decision, every word...it can count for eternity and glorify God,


or it can be a moment, thought, decision, or word that is lost for eternity.


A moment, thought, decision, or word that glorifies...something other than God.







I am overwhelmed with a desire to be overwhelmed by a passion for the work of the Lord. A friend of mine wrote a song a few years ago...to be honest I only remember two words: consume me. I am pleading with the Lord now that He grab my heart and fully consume me with a desire to glorify Him. People are lost. God is being mocked and cast aside...taken in vain.





Oh God, let me not forget that You are my purpose. Let me not be taken with my own vanity and desires; allow me to be all consumed by a fire for You. I yearn to be with You, to live a life that is pleasing to you, to not waste my moments. Keep me far from those things which will keep me from Your purpose, don't let me stray. I love You. Consume me.

Just Putting It Out There...

I've been temping for the last few weeks at a plastics factory, working in the assembly department. Essentially this means that my hands are completely occupied for eight hours while my mind is free to roam about where it pleases, doing what it will.

On my breaks I often have to pull out my journal and jot some things down because my mind has chosen to write a substantial amount of poetry...here's one that I like:


Today

I've thought about you a lot today
And I have some things I'd like to say
But instead I think I'll let them drift away
And I've thought about you a lot today.

I've thought about you a lot today
From smiles to frowns my lips have swayed
But my true feelings won't be betrayed
And I've thought about you a lot today.

I've thought about you a lot today
My heart and mind began to stray
There's a memory dragon that I can't slay
And I've thought about you a lot today.

I've thought about you a lot today
So I bend my knees and heart to pray
And my burdens upon this altar I lay
And I'll think of you no more today.


j. marie




There are some that I'm working on which are better...but this is what I'm willing to give for now. I think it's....complete. Yes.

Enjoy?



Peace and blessings.

The Jessica Chronicles: Wiper Worries

Things happen in my life. They're funny, ironic, crazy, and sometimes just things. Like, for instance, right after I broke up with the guy I had dated for two years, the first song I heard on the radio was "I Don't Love You Anymore" by Teddy Pendergrass. Go on, listen to it. Seriously? If you don't think that's funny, ironic, crazy, or some combination of the three, you owe me a dime. They're those moments when I'm sure my life is secretly a movie, or some sitcom that I don't know about. I'm sure they happen in your life, too, but I can only write about mine. These are the Jessica Chronicles.


This week in the Jessica Chronicles....


We have huge storms in southwestern Michigan. I know that I can quote some person or other claiming the county I live in as located in the very tip of Tornado Alley. That's not a true statement, but nonetheless, we often have huge thunderstorms, and our fair share of tornadoes.


There was a huge storm the other night. Friday night. The night I decided to transfer my dad's newly purchased vehicle to our friend's house.


Why does a new vehicle need to be taken to someone else's house, you may ask? Well, allow me to elucidate. My family has this thing about getting good deals. My mother is the most skilled coupon clipper in the world, my older brother will die before he buys something new that he could fix, and my younger brother is so often at Goodwill that they now have a place for him to sleep. My dad is a compulsive good-deal-getter. You can see it in his eyes and the way he scrunches his face when he is contemplating a good buy. I know exactly what his face must have looked like when he put in the bid for the old Sunfire that was available in the silent auction at the county jail. (Apparently, they repossess and sell the cars that belong to those whom they arrest...) I saw his face when he found out that his bid was the winning one.

It was ecstatic.

I took him to pick it up and followed him home. Upon getting out once we had reached our house, he informed me that it smelled bad and that the brakes needed work. (Still ecstatic.) He then declared that it should be taken to Bruce (our amazing mechanically-gifted friend who has saved us HUNDREDS of dollars in car repairs) so that all of its various issues could be determined.

I'm trying to become the favorite child in the family, and my attempts include fulfilling the requests of my father.



Thus, Friday afternoon found me making the (what should be) 5-minute drive over to Bruce's house. I was following my friend Tara, with whom I planned on jumping into the lake after dropping off the car. She'd been pushing me to swim with her for days. This trip would be two birds, one stone.

Lovely.

Or so I thought. I had been informed by a friend that it was raining in a town about fifteen minutes to the west of where I live, and that it would be headed my way. It would have been great if he had let me know that along with the coming rain would be a storm that would tear the world at the seams. He didn't, though. I did see the lightning begin to flash in the not-so-far-off distance during our little jaunt around the lake, and was right in the middle of thinking that swimming would be a no-go when the first drop of rain ominously hit my windshield. I closed the sunroof and (manually) rolled up the windows. Moments later it was pouring. Pouring-pouring. Not just the kind of pouring that people refer to when they want to make a story sound dramatic, the kind of pouring when the rain might as well be a cement wall in front of you. I couldn't see a thing.

Naturally, I start fumbling for the switch to turn on the windshield wipers.

...I fumble.

...and I fumble.

...and fumble.

A few terrible moments passed as I realized that the switch upon which the control for the wipers sat had been broken off at the base. It doesn't even exist. Awesome. I fumbled again for the hazard lights and stepped on my brakes, hoping Tara could see well enough to not smash into the back of my car. I contemplated just stopping the car and making a dash for hers, but was afraid I would be hit and killed by some driver as equally unable to see. So I began to roll down the window...

...and then promptly rolled it back up when I deduced I was getting wet.



There few a few more seconds of indecision before I gave in to the conclusion that I had to look out the window to drive. Thus, I dramatically threw my purse to the side and thrust my head out the window in a very Angelina-Jolie/chick-in-an-action-film kind of way. I'm pretty sure I yelled, "Move the purse!" in order to help myself along. It was a great plan.


But you know what's not easy to do when there is a load of rain and 80mph winds?

See.



There was a lot of bobbing in and out and thankful prayers that I knew the roads well enough that I didn't have to stay out the window, but nonetheless I was drenched by the time I parked the car and dashed into Tara's.


She stared at me, mouth hanging open, and asked, "Why are you soaked??"







That was the moment I remembered that all the windows back at the house were wide open.









*there was plenty of laughter/screaming in terror involved in this episode of the Jessica Chronicles.